It will take just 28 seconds to read this and change the way you think

There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind.
She hated everyone, except, perhaps, her boyfriend.
Yet he was always there for her. 
She told him:
"If I could only see, I would marry you."

One day, someone donated their eyes to her.
When the bandages came off, she was able to see everything.
Including her boyfriend.
He asked her: "Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?"

The girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind.
The sight of his scarred eye-lids shocked her. She hadn't expected that.
The thought of looking at them for the rest of her life was something she didn't want.
She refused to marry him and left him.

Her boyfriend cried but respected her decision.
Days later he wrote a note to her wishng her well:
"And take good care of your new eyes, my dear, for before they were yours,
They were mine."

This is how Headmind often works when our situation improves.
It is ungrateful, forgetful, complaining, and blind.
Only a very few of us remember what life was like before
Only a very few of us remember those who stood by us in adversity
Only a very few of us give thanks for what we have.

Life Is a Gift.

Before you complain about your food - think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about the place where you live - think of the homeless.

Before you complain about your partner - think of someone who lives alone.

Before you complain about your parents - think of the children who are in care.

Before you complain about traffic jams - think of those who have to walk.

Before you complain about your job - think of the unemployed, and those who cannot work.

And if life is too much for you - think of those who need you and love you.

Comments

[Ian]

I'm a big fan of your ideas, but this seems like a strange post to me. RT seems to me all about being true to ourselves and standing up for what we really feel and believe. I almost understand where you're going with this but really the last section just seems like a list of headmind-ish reasons to supress our real needs, and not speak out about situations that make us unhappy. Most people with ME for example seem acutely over-aware of everyone except themselves, and this seems to simply re-inforce a suggestion that they are just whinging timewasters who should gain some perspective and get on with it - which I know is not your view ! Looking forward to clarification...

[jon burg]

WOW, what a post! Just added this to my delicious (insert periods wherever you want) roll and I'm posting this tomorrow afternoon. WOW, what a story!

Thanks so much for MAKING MY DAY!

[John Eaton]

Dear Ian.

A good question and I will do my best to clarify.

At the moment I am working hard on studying all the different ways in which wrong work of Headmind deludes us and keeps us locked in unhealthy ways of being.

This blog is not aimed at people with M.E./CFS but at the general public. My aim is to offer new ways to reverse out of old ways of thinking/emoting/being and create a new awareness of human possibility.

As far as the thinking traps that keep people in M.E. these have mostly to do with worry about the symptoms. As you know, we advocate in such cases that people should a) learn to attune to Bodymind, b) recognise the symptoms as warning signals, c) express or act on the emotions and needs of the moment.

Once people have recovered from non-specific illness they may, like the rest of us, fail to connect to the peace and joy of living in the moment!

John

[John Eaton]

Thanks Jon. Glad you liked it. I was moved by it too.

[Ian]

Hi John,

Thanks for taking the time to reply - I see what you're saying. I still don't like the story much - what's the alternative, she spends the rest of her life with the person she loves out of gratitude, but every day feels guilty because she is reminded where her new-found vision comes from ? I guess you'll say she should have trusted her feelings and married him without seeing him, but somehow it doesn't work for me -it just feels sinister and sad...

Anyway ! More generally, I think it would be good for you to somehow flag the difference between "RT(herapy)-compatible posts" and "RT(hinking) posts" which might not sit well for someone with ME/CFS. Maybe I'm wrong but I imagine many people who are using RT to get well will be reading your posts, and usually I expect they will find them useful an insightful.

But I know from watching someone close to me work their way back to health using RT that it isn't at all easy, and there's a huge number of headmind obstacles which crop up to muddy the waters and sabotage the good stuff RT encourages.

I understand your enthusiasm for broadening out the scope of "Reverse Methods", but I think it would be a terrible shame if your posts in any way undermined or obscured the clarity of Reverse Therapy and it's insights for people who are still trying to get well. Or maybe I'm just thinking too much :-)

Keep up the great posts !

[Helen]

When I read this post I felt guilty and 'bad' (headmind) giving myself a hard time thinking I 'should' be grateful for the things I have, people far worse off than me etc. This blog post has been niggling away at me - then suddenly a light went on! It's about recognising and ENJOYING what I have, and experience in my life - being thankful coming from JOY not guilt!

[John Eaton]

Hi Helen

Thanks for making this valuable point. It was certainly not the intention behind the story to trigger self-recrimination, but to show how Headmind can block us from celebrating what we have.

Best wishes JOHN