Here's an email from a reader who wants to know more about how to switch off from the Internal Chatterbox (sometimes also known as 'The Internal Control Freak' in Reverse Therapy circles).
He writes:
"How do you stop Headmind going on and on at night when you are trying to get some sleep? Many of your blog posts for stopping Headmind recommend to go & do something else, especially something physical & endorphin producing. At night-time I find things like doing the bodyscan most relaxing, although that is not necessarily sleep inducing.
Chatting to people in my head is an obsession that makes me ill. For years I've re-played endless conversations with people in my head, especially when in bed - mostly going over what I actually said, but also going over what I/they might have said and my answers. These conversations can range from confrontational to light-hearted; from serious to trivial.
This chattering can be quite random. Yet it goes on endlessly, keeping me awake and driving me mad!"
How do I switch it off when I need to go to sleep?"
And here is my answer:
1. If Headmind is overactive at night then it is almost certainly over-active daytime too. You will need to work on slowing Headmind down, or switching off from it regularly, during daylight hours. You can achieve that by utilising breath meditation, Tai Chi, Binaural beats, dance, sensate focusing, or substitutes for any of these. It is no good going through the day staying stuck in Headmind and then hoping it will quieten down later. Rather like training a badly-behaved dog, you have to show Headmind who is Master. Learning to live each day in Awareness of the present moment is also key.
2. If you work at a Headmind-centred job (for example, Information Technology) then you need to balance that with Bodymind-centred activities when you finish work, well before you retire to bed. Sport/gym-work/swimming is ideal for the purpose, as is any kind of handicraft or gardening.
3. Living in Headmind tends to create extra Adrenalin release and Beta brain wave states. Too much Adrenalin makes you fidgety, restless and agitated. It also triggers overwork in the frontal cortex, making it much more likely that you will worry more. A constant state of watchfulness and self-analysis maintains beta waves which, in turn, trigger still more internal chatter.
If either case is true for you then you need to:
a) Dilute the Adrenalin rush before you get into bed. You could do that by taking a hot bath or using one of the instant stress-busters I recommended in my pre-Xmas post.
b) Slow down your brain wave-states from Beta to Theta. One way to do that is to listen to one of the binaural beat programs I recommend on the right hand side of this blog.
4. Having suffered from an overactive Headmind myself for many years before I got wise to its tricks, I found that you could outwit it by giving it something absorbing to do that is also trivial, boring or complicated. Counting downwards from 501 in increasing intervals of 3, 6, 9, 12, and so on is an old favourite. But reading tedious scientific papers on psychology usually does it for me!
Original image by sngyork
