Reverse Thinking

Your balancing act

One feature I frequently observe about my clients - those who have non-specific illnesses that is - is that they have unbalanced lifestyles.

Obvious catches are that they focus too much on making money. Or being 'perfect' parents. Or that they spend too much time chasing other people. Or too much time alone.

Narrow-mindedness is a Headmind trap typically linked to the human weakness for what I have  elsewhere called 'bananas'.

Another way to put this is that when we become obsessional we become joyless. We also reduce the emotional rewards available to us - which leads, eventually, to reduced endorphin release in the brain.

A narrowing of interests leads to boredom, routine, repetition and a loss of creativity. Which, in turn, triggers a reduction in brain neuroplasticity.

Finally, an unbalanced lifestyle reduces our access to personal genius: We become less than we could be - and far more predictable.

You can do a rough check on how balanced your life is right now by having a look at the wheel of life diagram at the top. Going round each of the sectors, give yourself a score out of 10 for how much interest you take in that area of life (you have to be really honest here).

For a well-balanced life you need to be scoring at least '5' for each item. The higher your scores the higher your self-actualizing potential (provided the score for any one sector is not too far ahead of any of the others).

It will take just 28 seconds to read this and change the way you think

There was a blind girl who hated herself because she was blind.
She hated everyone, except, perhaps, her boyfriend.
Yet he was always there for her. 
She told him:
"If I could only see, I would marry you."

One day, someone donated their eyes to her.
When the bandages came off, she was able to see everything.
Including her boyfriend.
He asked her: "Now that you can see the world, will you marry me?"

The girl looked at her boyfriend and saw that he was blind.
The sight of his scarred eye-lids shocked her. She hadn't expected that.
The thought of looking at them for the rest of her life was something she didn't want.
She refused to marry him and left him.

Her boyfriend cried but respected her decision.
Days later he wrote a note to her wishng her well:
"And take good care of your new eyes, my dear, for before they were yours,
They were mine."

This is how Headmind often works when our situation improves.
It is ungrateful, forgetful, complaining, and blind.
Only a very few of us remember what life was like before
Only a very few of us remember those who stood by us in adversity
Only a very few of us give thanks for what we have.

Life Is a Gift.

Before you complain about your food - think of someone who has nothing to eat.

Before you complain about the place where you live - think of the homeless.

Before you complain about your partner - think of someone who lives alone.

Before you complain about your parents - think of the children who are in care.

Before you complain about traffic jams - think of those who have to walk.

Before you complain about your job - think of the unemployed, and those who cannot work.

And if life is too much for you - think of those who need you and love you.